Observation 3

Based on my revisions, I have found that I can improve my writing in many areas. First, I need to improve my use of MLA formatting. I also need to include a works cited page with my essay. I made many gramatical errors and went back and fixed those, as well as other minor mistakes. I went back and revised my theses and made it less general and more arguable. I am going to work on getting a few outside sources to back up my arguments and further support my paper. I am also trying to analyze my commercial deeper and recognize more of the rhetorical strategies used. Finally, I go back every few days and rewatch my commercial to see if I spot anything new that I can include in my essay, as it is not quite long enough yet.